We scream, and fight, and have almost called it off, over politics. I often think that my home resembles our country. Lately, I see posts on Facebook about de-friending people over these things and lines are constantly being drawn: “If you believe ____ we’re done!” I get it. I’ve been there. There have been times that I thought our divide was too vast and questioned everything we have.

But, I love him. We have built a life together and aside from our differences in politics, it’s a good life. He is a good man and is really good to me. He loves me. He makes me laugh.

He also has also made me shake and cry over his defense of his party. I have thought of drawing that line in the sand that I see so many others making. I have thought, “how could we go on with such differences?” But then I remember who he REALLY is.

He is the guy who spent hours chasing an injured pelican: jumping into shivering waters, running through thigh-high surf, leading the charge to save this endangered bird. He is the guy who gave up our inaugural boat trip to the island in order to save a family whose boat was beached. He is the guy who held me when my ex-husband died, wiping my tears and doing everything he could to make me smile during such a difficult and dark time.

And yes, he’s a Trump supporter.

Literally, my job is to stop hate and spread love, making the world a kinder and gentler place (I’ll let you know when I start collecting a paycheck) and if I divorced him over our political differences, I would not only be a hypocrite but I would also be increasing the divide within our country: adding two more people to the statistics of segregation and hate.

Now that might sound a bit melodramatic but it truly starts within our homes: with our family, friends, and in our daily lives. How can I (or anyone else for that matter) state with conviction that we need more compassion, peace and love in our country, if I don’t embody that in my own home? How can I tell others to accept the differences of strangers, when I can’t do it within my own relationship? How can I go into the streets and fight for unification, and then walk away from someone I love?

If we turn our backs because of the divide, it only grows. It spreads into our social circles, neighborhoods, communities and government. If we turn and run into our perspective corners, focusing only on the dichotomies, and only side with our “team,” our Union will dissolve. We must remember why our friends are our friends. We must remember why we love the people we do. We must remember why we’re the United States of America and we love our country.

Fear and hate destroy from within — within each and every one of us. “When we know better, we do better” and if our backs are turned, no one is learning anything. Start focusing on the reasons these people are in our lives and how much we care about them, regardless of their politics. Start being the change you want to see in our country. Try to bridge the divide. Try to listen instead of argue. Try to unite, not divide. Try to Love.

We‘re all in this together